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Ten Things
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rinhriveiel-- this covers anyone and everyone, not just people on my flist (I threw my parents in there, haha).
1. You all made it worth it. Every single one of you.(Especially those of you who were involved in the best graduation ever.)
2. I've always been flattered that you will sometimes come to me for advice or "just to talk", even though I'm both a horrible advice-giver and talker. We don't really see you around much anymore (from what I've heard, no one does)-- but when the weather gets a bit warmer I'll make Jenny invite you to the lake, when it's free. And then you can strand me in a canoe again or something. Because you're my faaaaavorite. 8)
3. The three of you were my favorite thing about middle school. German class next year will be boring without being part of a CULT.
4. A few years ago when things at home weren't going so well, I used to get online late at night and hope that you would get on too, because it was really the only time that I could pretend that things were normal. (One of the most awesome things about the internet is that when something's wrong it's easy to keep other people from noticing. Unless you're on Skype or webcam or something, I guess.) Now, I'm glad I still get to talk to you, even if it isn't all that often.
5. I miss you guys. I hope you're all doing okay.
6. Despite all the crap that went down, I still like you, and I still consider you a friend. I hope you don't think that I feel otherwise.
7. I worry about you too much and I know it makes you mad, but I can't help it. It's not that I don't trust you, it's that if I don't worry and pay too much attention to the little things and what they might mean, I'm afraid that I'm going to miss something big. It makes me mad sometimes, because you say that you're better and that you're not in that mindset anymore, but you were saying that a few years ago too and then look what happened. I know that it's not supposed to be my "job" to monitor you, and I know that me being stupid and paranoid puts a lot of unnecessary strain on our relationship sometimes, but I almost feel like I'd rather have a ruined relationship with you if it means that you'll definitely be okay.
8. I hold a grudge against you, which is kind of ridiculous because I hate grudges and I normally don't hold them. But it was kind of a big thing and you did things that someone in your position should never have done, and now you refuse to ever talk about it. I know that's your way of saying that you know you were wrong and that you wish you had done things differently, but pretending that none of it happened isn't going to solve anything. I hate spending time with you, and even though I know that's wrong and that it really hurts your feelings, I can't help it. Whenever I'm around you I feel like an eight-year-old again; like I have to be on guard for whatever you're going to say and do next. It's exhausting.
9. I worry too much about annoying you-- all of you, really, but especially you and you. You're both so awesome, and I know I can't compare. But really, I don't feel the need to "compare" or be "just as good" or whatever-- I just hope that I'm not making things less fun for anyone else.
10. I miss you-- but I believe that someday our paths will cross again, and I'll be able to give you the birdhouse that I owe you.
AND I PROBABLY WON'T RESPOND TO COMMENTS, OUT OF EMBARRASSMENT. LOL WHUT.
rinhriveiel-- this covers anyone and everyone, not just people on my flist (I threw my parents in there, haha). 1. You all made it worth it. Every single one of you.
2. I've always been flattered that you will sometimes come to me for advice or "just to talk", even though I'm both a horrible advice-giver and talker. We don't really see you around much anymore (from what I've heard, no one does)-- but when the weather gets a bit warmer I'll make Jenny invite you to the lake, when it's free. And then you can strand me in a canoe again or something. Because you're my faaaaavorite. 8)
3. The three of you were my favorite thing about middle school. German class next year will be boring without being part of a CULT.
4. A few years ago when things at home weren't going so well, I used to get online late at night and hope that you would get on too, because it was really the only time that I could pretend that things were normal. (One of the most awesome things about the internet is that when something's wrong it's easy to keep other people from noticing. Unless you're on Skype or webcam or something, I guess.) Now, I'm glad I still get to talk to you, even if it isn't all that often.
5. I miss you guys. I hope you're all doing okay.
6. Despite all the crap that went down, I still like you, and I still consider you a friend. I hope you don't think that I feel otherwise.
7. I worry about you too much and I know it makes you mad, but I can't help it. It's not that I don't trust you, it's that if I don't worry and pay too much attention to the little things and what they might mean, I'm afraid that I'm going to miss something big. It makes me mad sometimes, because you say that you're better and that you're not in that mindset anymore, but you were saying that a few years ago too and then look what happened. I know that it's not supposed to be my "job" to monitor you, and I know that me being stupid and paranoid puts a lot of unnecessary strain on our relationship sometimes, but I almost feel like I'd rather have a ruined relationship with you if it means that you'll definitely be okay.
8. I hold a grudge against you, which is kind of ridiculous because I hate grudges and I normally don't hold them. But it was kind of a big thing and you did things that someone in your position should never have done, and now you refuse to ever talk about it. I know that's your way of saying that you know you were wrong and that you wish you had done things differently, but pretending that none of it happened isn't going to solve anything. I hate spending time with you, and even though I know that's wrong and that it really hurts your feelings, I can't help it. Whenever I'm around you I feel like an eight-year-old again; like I have to be on guard for whatever you're going to say and do next. It's exhausting.
9. I worry too much about annoying you-- all of you, really, but especially you and you. You're both so awesome, and I know I can't compare. But really, I don't feel the need to "compare" or be "just as good" or whatever-- I just hope that I'm not making things less fun for anyone else.
10. I miss you-- but I believe that someday our paths will cross again, and I'll be able to give you the birdhouse that I owe you.
AND I PROBABLY WON'T RESPOND TO COMMENTS, OUT OF EMBARRASSMENT. LOL WHUT.